White & White

I have created a creature which acts as the embodiment of self-awareness. A blank canvas, dominated by emptiness. I would listen to the creature and praise it for making me aware of the things I couldn’t be.
The little creature, who in an almost perverted way, ate away my feelings of being. Believing that his false promise of becoming a shell, becoming nothing, would free me from the thought, the nightmare, of never being able to fully express myself, of becoming truly me.

I believed that stripping myself of any identity was a way to protect myself, I wanted to feel safe. By revisiting my childhood through therapy, I realized that it was a time when I truly felt myself, it wasn’t even a thought that crossed my mind. I loved playing dress-up and so the video-installation displays a younger me trying to play dress-up with the older me.